Versjes
Ik zie ze niet
Ik zie de mensen. Ze bestaan.
En ik zie ze bestaan.
Ik zie ze zitten, zie ze staan, ik zie ze lopen en ze gaan.
Ik kijk en zie, maar ik zie niets. Niets dat ik ooit zal weten. Ik zie ze, maar ik zie ze niet.
Snap je?
Ik weet dus niets. Ik zie ze wel, die mensen voor de ramen, en die op straat en in de trein en overal tezamen, ik zie ze wel, maar ik zie niets. Ze zijn alweer verdwenen.
En toch: ik weet dat ze bestaan. Dat zie ik dan weer wel.
Maar als ik, zoals ik hier sta, zoals ik sta te kijken
Nog steeds niet weet naar wie ik kijk
Hoe moeten zij dan weten
Wie ik ben?
Wat doe je nou? schreeuwt ze me toe.
Ze heeft het raam geopend.
Mijn naam is Daan, roep ik terug. Ik woon hier in de buurt.
Maar wat deed je?
Ik keek, zeg ik, ik keek naar jou.
Waarom? vraagt ze, verbaasd alom
Omdat ik zat te denken… Als ik, zoals ik hier besta, zoals ik sta te kijken, nog steeds niet weet naar wie ik kijk…
Aniek, zegt ze. Ik heet Aniek.
Nu ken ik haar. Nu zie ik het. Nu zie ik wie ze is. Nu zie ik haar piano, haar glas wijn, haar hockeysticks. Nu zie ik hoe ze ’s avonds, als ze in haar kussen schuilt, nog even zachtjes om de liefde van haar leven huilt. Ik zie hoe ze zich door de ochtendmist naar school toe fietst. En hoe ze vrijdag in de kroeg haar sigaretjes bietst.
(en krijgt)
Nu ken ik haar. Ze heet Aniek. Ze woont op nummer zeven. Dat wist ik al, maar ooit was dat een nutteloos gegeven.
Aniek en Daan, dat past precies.
Ze knikt en hangt naar voren.
Wil je anders thee? vraagt ze.
Ik schud mijn hoofd, dit is genoeg. Ik hoef niets meer te horen.
Ik zie Aniek, en ze bestaat.
Dat weet ik nu wel zeker.
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